Church & Worship / Encountering Anti-Semitism

2/13/09

Funny things can happen when people, sometimes close to you, or not, find out that you’re jewish, eventhough you are worshipping as any other born again believer.  At times, I have felt that I need to tone down my jewish pride, then think that I’ve been a sell out in doing so.  At present, I’m worshipping at a Pentecostal church with my gentile boyfriend and have found the people to be quite welcoming for the most part.  You would think, as the worship in the church is lots of tremendous music, singing and fervent praise and prayer, that I would feel at home (that’s my opinion in that aspect), however, I feel something is missing.  Often, I have seen jews raising up the Torah and the utter joy and lifting up that follows with the dancing and singing, I’ve felt that I more identify with that scenerio alone, than on my usual Sunday morning , where I am praising the Lord, but don’t feel completely accepted, nor fully "into" what’s going on in they’re version of praise as opposed to what I feel a Messianic worship service might be like (which I honestly have no idea and am admittedly intimidated, as it was a big step to go to a Pentecostal church, as I don’t believe certain aspects of their beliefs).

 Is there anyone else who has felt this way, in any manner that you can relate to?

 My second  "what’s up", is experiencing anti-semitism…..I’ve lost a job over it, the "it" was being asked by an iranian muslim if I was a jew, and I said "Yes".....a week later, FIRED! The story of that is quite extended and it was probably better that I was let from that job, as I believe it was beginning to become an issue amongst the muslims working there (only 60 people worked there) that a jewish woman didn’t act like a muslim woman.  This was rather odd to just walk up to someone and ask that question, as I don’t think that being jewish means you "look" a certain way, but these men seemed to think so…..as a side, all through childhood, I complained about my hair, so to make me feel better, my auntie would always say "You have Bible hair, naturally beautiful", not until I was an adult did I truly appreciate her cleverness :)

Next, was a bit of a surprise…I was strolling an art museum with my gentile boyfriend when all of a sudden he said that he had something to tell me, I thought he was going to break up with me, but he admitted that he had gotten into a very heated argument with a lawyer ( who happened to be jewish) and ended with calling him an anti-semitic slur, which I’m sure anyone can guess what that word was. He apologized to me, but I asked him if that is what he really feels in his heart about the jewish people, as we are one people, yet so varied.  He said no, which I hope is true, that is between him and the Lord. 

Another instance is one no one probably thinks about causing attention to your jewish-ness  :)   jewelry. A few years ago, I worked for Target, the store that so many love….a jewish gal I worked with wore her very conservative Star of David daily, was pulled aside by Human Resources and told to put it under her shirt, she was very succinct in telling them no way….employees who wore crosses or crucifixes weren’t addressed, hmmmm, what was going on there?

So, recently, for my valentine’s gift, my boyfriend gave my a lovely Star of David pendant and matching earrings, which I wear proudly just as I wear the cross of my Saviour.The Star reminds me how our Lord was found under the star in His so humble manger, the Star reminds me of how our people were identified and the suffering that followed, only to still be a hopeful and righteously proud people.

Ok, I don’t think that I’m finished with the church issue….I think that I may be feeling the rejection of Christian gentiles against Jews eventhough they (I) are believers in a Judeo Christian based faith (not sure if that was worded properly). I don’t feel that when I’m asked what I worship, rather am as a branch of religion, that I should answer "Pentecostal".  I feel that I am a Jew; in my Messiah I am Born Again as I have accepted Him.  When I say that I’m a Born Again Jew, at church or wherever, I can sense that look on people’s faces, and that they don’t know what to say or have something to say but know it would probably be better they didn’t; it’s almost as if they want to correct me or just don’t think that I’m saved.

Does anyone experience this?  I feel, rather I know, that there aren’t any organizations where I live, it’s kind of isolated as far as fellowship with other believers goes. Sometimes I feel that if it weren’t for Zola Levitt Ministries (on tv and online), that would be the only Messianic Jewish contact we’d have!  

Anyone, anything?  Thanks!  :)

Submitted by: Robin, February 13th, 2009 Topic: Messianic Forums
Tags: messianic judaism, Messianic Judaism, Pentecostal worship, The Messianic Center , The Messianic center, The Messianic Center

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2 Comments

Kelly Maria Gazendam commented on February 18, 2009:

We raise dogs and recently, there was a young couple who came to buy one. There was nothing unusual about them in their manner of speech or behavior or any jewellery that would tell me that they were Jewish BUT our spirits connected! I just knew and I believe that Holy Spirit gave me that connection to know that I was selling to one of G-d's chosen people. If you're in a church that you don't feel comfortable in - either educate or move on. I personally would be honored to receive teaching from a Messianic Jew even though I am not one. My greatgrandmother is Jewish, however, we are raised protestant. peace.

murraystudios commented on February 15, 2009:

Hello Robin I can definitely relate with you in regard to attending a non messianic church. There is a disconnection there for me. Its not that I don't enjoy what the pastor is saying or the songs we sing. I just don't feel at home. Something is missing. No one at my church knows that I am a messianic jew. Its much too big and nobody gives anybody the time of day really. Before the final prayer is done, people are putting on their coats and heading for the door. I don't look forward to going at all, which is sad. I've only attended a few messianic congregations, but I enjoyed them very much. Unfortunately there aren't any in my area. I want to worship and pray with like-minded people. I love worshiping to messianic music. My iPod is filled with it! haha. I have had a few (I wouldn't say anti-semetic) but encounters myself with people giving me the "look" when they hear that I am a Jew or see my Star pendant. I know exactly the "look" you are talking about. I try and explain to them briefly what it means to be a Messianic Jew and our beliefs and they almost have this look of disgust and confusion. I find myself not talking about it with others. It shouldn't be that way. Its not that Im not proud of who I am or what I am, but If I can tell the person Im talking with is remotely uninterested or skeptical than Id rather not waste my time. The thing that I get the most flack for is eating Kosher. Being invited to dinner and they've cooked a nice big ham. haha I then have to tell them that I eat kosher and Ill get the occasional eye roll or a sigh even. They always ask why and Ill kindly explain and there comes the "look" again. Or If I meet a new girl, Ill of course tell her about my beliefs and that I eat kosher but she fails to tell her parents and they invite me over for dinner. Needless to say, the mother cooks something unclean and I cant eat it. The parents then give her the "look" haha. I've found that the christians I've met don't want to hear why I eat kosher, Or why I believe it to be law. They change the subject or avoid the conversation completely. Maybe they feel convicted but know that they aren't going to take that step themselves. Maybe they think my eating kosher is just rubbish and unnecessary. Either way I don't care. I know the truth and Ill stick by my beliefs and the law of G-D until the end. Ill keep you in my prayers. Ill ask HaShem to give you strength during those time of persecution. To soften peoples hearts to our words when we try and explain our direction and that during those times He gives us his words and wisdom. Baruch HaShem!

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